Venus with a Razor

I blame Botticelli’s Venus. Just look at the mythical creature, standing there so coy on her halfshell and looking like she’s made of alabaster — no way those smooth pale limbs could ever sprout a single misplaced hair, let alone the furry forest of neglect that is a side-effect of long Northern winters!

Cold weather, long underwear, you get the picture…

Truly, unless there’s a hot midwinter romance going on, the whole tedious business of shaving legs is likely to be allowed to slide a bit…

Like, oh, until the first hint of Spring and impending bathing-suit season… or until the Swag Fairy sends a new razor to review, whichever comes first.

So, listen up here!

I rushed the deforestation season by at least three weeks, just for you — just to be able to give you the firsthand scoop on Gillette’s new ‘flagship’ razor for women.

Good stuff first —

• I like the soft gel handle in perky green and blue colours, easy to hold onto when your hands are all soapy.

• I like the five blades that do, as advertised, catch virtually every hair on the first pass.

• I like the way the head so obligingly tilts to follow one’s womanly curves.

• And I like how easy it is to change blades, with the push of a button.

But I’ve got some serious reservations about the companion ShowerPod…

The theory of the ShowerPod is fine:
It’s a little plastic gizmo that attaches to your shower wall, to conveniently store the extra blades and save last-minute wet dripping tip-toeing across the bathroom floor when you find yourself in the shower with a dull razor. And the razor itself hangs up on the outside, all tidy and out of the way.

Yes, I pressed the ShowerPod against a clean flat section of wall — heck, I even cleaned a section for the purpose — but would it stay stuck up there?

No.

The third time the ShowerPod crashed down on my foot, the drive-in movie flashbacks started up. Remember Invasion of the Body Snatchers?

I’m as big a fan of science-fiction flicks as the next person, but there’s a new rule around here: no pods in the comfort and privacy of my bath, thanks very much!

(The occasional well-mannered Wookiee, perhaps.)

Okay, so maybe I’ve got a few suction cup issues. They’ve just never worked for me — ever. And I’ve got a trail of broken glass suncatchers behind me, to prove it…

Bottom line?

It’s a good razor for a fair price, and what more can one ask? But I’d love to see it packaged without the ShowerPod, for those of us who are happy enough to live by razor alone. The way I see it, even if you’ve got better luck with suction cups than I do, it’s just another plastic thingummie to have to clean around in the shower stall.